May 31, 2011

A Rose By Any Other Name...

What is love? What does it mean to you? What kinds of love are there? These are all themes in the book that I just read. The book is called, "rose : love in violent times" by Inga Muscio

This book touches on the complexity of love and love in times that are violent, angry, frustrating, etc. Here are a few excerpts that I found that touched my inner me.

"One of the key hallmarks of real love--which our culture fails to identify for the most part--- is a commitment to adore the asshole that someone is. To fully protect and revere someone's weaknesses, phobias, insecurities, and maddening habits, as much as their glowing qualities. It is easy to love how great someone is. It is difficult to love what an asshole someone is. And make no mistake, everyone is an asshole." 
(p. 223-224)

"Real love means finding value in most everything, and new ways to value yourself, the planet, animals, trees, people you like, people you don't like, as so on. 

In love, you do not consider someone "marriage material" based on their income. 
In love, you do not bury your emotions so deeply that others become fodder for your deepest fears. Therefore, you do not start a whisper campaign about the nice-looking woman in your office who rebuffed your sexual advances, or because you are jealous of her appearance.

In love, our aging parents are our elders to whom we owe a great deal. You do not stick them in an old-folks farm, unless they express a desire to live in such a place. 

If we are a culture that loves, none of our children would be "banned" from the family because they are homos, or because they choose someone outside the family's race or religion or because they are transgender. 

In love, you bolster and support, you do not try to 'change' anyone."

You can change the violence of our world sooner than you can change an individual."
(p. 225-226)

This books gives an insight that I did not have on the subject before. It's a view that is open, loving, assertive, caring, happy, sad, frustrating and it is.

I've read another book of Inga's (here) and I am quite excited because she is coming to Village Book's here in Bellingham to speak about her book on the 8th of June. Can't wait for that!


  1. I admire your bravery in blogging. I write a bit, but am too intimidated to make it public. I like to read blogs, but rarely comment. But, since you so sweetly begged... Mama Heidi

  2. Thank you Mama Heidi! :)

    For me, my blog is a therapeutic way of dealing will things, even though it's mostly crafty and writing prompts, it helps. :)


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